10 ways broke people console each other

Broke people will tell you “All is vanity” when they are unable to accomplish their desires. When the conversation is about how so and so has made it in life, the penniless ones will say at the end we’ll all rest six feet under without those pricey possessions.

Keg is better than beer

When their wallets fail to afford them some beers, some Kenyans turn to cheaper liquor like keg and resort to praising it as the best thing since sliced bread. The mlevi will try to convince you how keg is far better than beer. Arguing that the problem is the places it is sold. “Keg is affordable and brewed better than expensive beers. I take the jug of Sh200 and I am fully sorted” he will say but once he gets loaded again, he runs to the darling beer.

Moneyed are not ‘blessed’

Kenyans struggling to eke out a living will claim that you cannot be blessed with riches and also be good between the sheets. They believe God offers men one of them to keep their spouses happy. A lie that has been repeated for ages by hustlers who believe the moneyed do not satisfy their wives. “Hawa wako na mapesa hawawezaniii” the broke dude purports.

Veggies make you live longer

They become health conscious once they get penurious.  They speak badly of nyama, pizza, and other delicious pricey foods. Kusota pushes them to sukumawiki and they become crusaders of how boiled veggies are healthier and remedy to aging. But that is only short-lived. The gospel is abandoned when the wallet gets heavy again.

Walking is better than driving

Because he cannot afford a matatu or nduthi services, a Kenyan will walk for 15 kilometres to and from his hustles to save the little he has but instead of admitting things are bad, he purports he is just exercising. “Nowadays I prefer jogging from work to keep fit. It is healthier than using matatus all the time”. When salo finally comes, he goes for Uber services as he dismisses matatu.

Happiness is in slums not Runda

Some Kenyans at the bottom of the social strata have repeated the claim there is more love in Kibera than Runda to the point it is seen as the truth. This is a veiled argument to defend their not-so-good status. How many separations and homicides are reported in the tranquil, lush suburbs compared to Mathare slums or Githurai estate?

Lots of money is evil

When you can’t have it, hate it is most Kenyans' line of sour grapes. They will wake up early and toil for hours to get money but still purport that money is the root cause of evil. To them, the richer you are, the more horrible person you are, a fallacious argument to veil penury.

Blessed are the poor

Some people believe misery is close to holiness, thus the Almighty cares more about the haves than have-nots. When their pockets are torn, they distort the holy word to imply that the richer you get, the distance between you and God widens. Some pastors spread this narrative yet they live lavishly. Are we not told God is very, very rich?

Moneyed are not cheerful

When depressed and penniless, most Kenyans will argue that even those loaded with money do not enjoy it fully. They will say such people do not have good sleep as they ponder about their wealth. To defend themselves why they prefer the little they have, they will give examples of tycoons who died, leaving their children and grandchildren squandering it.

Riches attract insecurity

A common belief is that if you are moneyed, you are an easy target of criminals than the poor guy struggling to eke out a living. It is true but some broke dudes will purport it is better to be deprived and enjoy a quiet life off the radar than have riches and live as an anxious person. These are the same people who will tell you how they would buy cars, houses, and date multiple girls if they struck it rich today.