Opinion: Got a crush on him? Shoot your shot!

Opinion: Got a crush on him? Shoot your shot! (Photo: iStock)

So the modern woman finds herself at a crossroads yet again. She is emancipated, intelligent and independent. She is tough and sweet at the same time and she can attempt to change a flat tyre albeit with a hint of clumsiness and a dash of woishes.

She is juggling a job and her studies and still finds time for friends. Indeed, she has come a long way from her female counterparts of the past generation, who sat on the doorstep waiting for baba watoto to bring food home.  She has fought male dominance in all facets of life and she stands shoulder to shoulder with the man. She can now look him directly in the eye and say

‘I made it, I am here.’

She has gone for everything she wants in life and her success is a result of sheer hard work.  So then what makes it difficult for her to approach the man of her dreams and make known her desires? Shouldn’t that be the cherry on the cake?

While she has found it easy to chair boardroom meetings, make top corporate decisions and comfortably hold the corner office, she suddenly questions herself when it comes to approaching that beau that she fancies.

Suddenly, she does not want equality any more, she wants to be the weaker sex and have the man serenade her.  

She will angle for a promotion at the workspace but can never dream of making the first move to win her crush. She enjoys dominating in all aspects of her life except where her heart is involved.

Well, I am not saying this should be a walk in the park, if men were honest enough they would admit approaching ladies is just as difficult. However, we have to weigh the options of walking with an unrealistically huge cucumber in the bag or facing the possible embarrassment of rejection. It’s a good thing that the modern-day woman knows the nutritional value of various fruits and which one to turn to when her newfound confidence wanes.

 Before you get carried with the idea and approach any Njuguna, Otieno or Wafula, it is probably best to decide if you have a crush on the dude or if it is that time of the month when anything in a trouser looks handsome.  Scientists call it ovulation.

Once you have determined that you are not just horny think of a foolproof strategy for approaching the prey of your dreams.

So how do you shoot your shot? This shouldn’t be hard, women deal with stressful situations daily, whether it is not finding products for our kinky hair, fighting acne or accepting that we cannot all have bigger busts and wasp-like waistlines.  Approaching a male homo-sapien should be an easy affair.

However, what we are not going to do is copy the teenage-male approach of Dming a crush with endless ‘hey beautiful’ on all social media platforms- this will only make us sound desperate.   Find a random topic to talk about- it could be something as trivial as the weather and very soon he will be telling you about the climate in Shamahoho where he grew up. It would certainly help if you had mutual interests because you would be excused for tagging him to posts on Facebook. Whatever you do, start small and keep moving because a man may not know you are dying for him until you spell it out.

Men only know how to interpret soppy eyes in naïve college girls – not a successful woman who drives her Porshe Cayenne Turbo at a breakneck speed along Mombasa road. No, they are not good at reading signs on the wall unless you make it a little too obvious. Only then will they crumble fast and quickly assume an imaginary lead that will leave you smiling surreptitiously at the folly of the male ego.  Allow yourself to be vulnerable and shoot your shot.

If Eve managed to convince Adam to eat the leftover fruit that the devil had recently bit into, you should be able to hack this.

If it does not work, at least you gave it a try- you live to shoot another day.


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