Like him? Then shoot your shot

Like him? Then shoot your shot (Photo: iStock)

I have been an ardent advocate of shots being fired, from any direction. I am talking of safe shots. I abhor the experience Rwandans went through during the genocide. Shots should not be about war but about taking chances boldly and hoping that everyone comes out of the situation alive and smiling or with a little tear.

The courage to approach another human however is exactly what every woman needs to traverse the dating industry. I call it industry because the landscape of meeting and knowing men has become so transactional these days that we only carry our lungs to the site and leave our delicate hearts behind.

Transactional, because, unlike the days when two young people met under a tree or at the market centre to figure out their future together, these days a coffee date that yields nothing costs an arm and a leg.

With the fluid dating circumstances, it is understandable that on average, a woman has to kiss many frogs before landing Prince Charming. We are talking ten dates and the costs include Uber rides and many a time Airbnbs where test drives are done.

Women have become bold and daring. I have encountered rare shots lately, even Somalis have joined the fray to state what they are looking for and to describe what they are bringing to the table. The Somalis are not afraid of social stigma anymore and are willing to go learn some Luhya in Teso land or even Bugandaland for some watery experiences. 

Twenty-three-year-olds are also already out there searching for either love or money from wababas. These kids to say the truth have imitations of mammary glands unfit to feed a youngling let alone a grown male with 32 teeth. In all these what matters is the fact that women have shaken off their naivety and we deserve a big applause.

They believe that like the other gender, they have what it takes to approach the community of men and select carefully what they want. Girls of this age previously simply sat back and waited for any potbellied academician who heads the faculty to throw vibes at them. Young women who crave attention now can look for the attention in the murky waters.

Come to think of it, the older a woman became the more stigmatised she was in society. A woman of 50 was not welcome in the dating scene. They were considered retired and confined to nursing their grandchildren.

But today this constituency is the most liberated, freely prowling Tinder to sample fellow retirees and boys alike. They shoot their shots at trendy clubs in town putting youthful babes to shame as they cart away the best of the revellers. While in Kenya we hide under make-up and hipsters to try and conceal age and wrinkles, in Tanzania older women come to fish in vintage wigs and flowing vitenges. 

Traits hitherto considered taboo are now displayed in the open. Bisexual women looking for mates and heterosexuals seeking out married couples to add juice to their unions. Interestingly, there is demand for such offers. The boldness of this generation! Anyway, such boldness will ensure that women do not only suffer heartache and financial losses but also experience their womanly potential before they wrinkle and submit.

The net effect of this boldness is that society as a whole is happy because men have to work less and judge less.



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