We couldn’t understand how we got such five-star treatment in a wedding where we hardly knew anyone. Weddings are like government offices. To be served well there, one needs big connections.
Whereas the demonstrators in Kisii did it with boulders huge enough to stop an army, Kiambu folks blocked the road with few pebbles which could be easily removed if the need arose.
Every neighbourhood had its own mathe, a woman dealing in things that men found hard to resist, ranging from potent weed strains to intoxicating brews that could leave one blind.
On day one, the training starts after the tea break, mainly because the colleagues spend hours hugging in the corridors. A top honcho arrives at noon to declare the kongamano officially open.
Men, by their very nature, are hunters. The sense of danger appeals to them. That’s why they love speed that kills, guns and rough sports or bad girls.
All the ladies present wanted to have a dance with Riggy G. He ended up dancing with several honourable daughters of Mumbi and finally busted the myth that sons of Mumbi can’t dance.
I am reliably informed that there are some ladies who don’t see eye to eye with their shady rural cousins. My village has enough young men who can be hired as fake cousins at short notice.
In the same spirit, this festive season, he should visit Kenyans and see how they are doing, with several new taxes he has introduced.
If you had purposed to build yourself a house this year and haven’t done so by now, console yourself in that Jesus was practically homeless, yet we celebrate him every year.
Ahead lies 365 days with no mistakes in them. There are so many opportunities to live to our full potential, to repair bonds with family and friends and to make time for ourselves.
No longer just another story, it held a weighty reality that I couldn’t fully grasp, as suicide has always confounded me.
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