Man discovers secret wedding after casual relationship

A sad man holding his head. (Courtesy/iStock)

It’s around 8.30pm and the activity at the barbershop is somehow getting slow; a time to either go through my phone to get a glimpse of the latest trending stories, or to listen to my favourite song play to wind up a busy day at the ‘Head’ office.

Just then, this middle aged man walks in and removes his tie as I usher him into the barber’s chair. He is well built as is evident through his tight fitting blue shirt. And as I sterilize the machine, I ask him whether he goes to the gym just to strike up a conversation because he has been my client for the last three months and I know he’s good storyteller.

My muscled client says he used to work out but he stopped a few years ago after a painful heart break that happened just before he married his current lovely wife. He said he met a fine lady at an event and they immediately clicked. Soon, one thing led to another.

First, it was a friends-with-benefits kind of relationship and as time went by, he started inviting her to his house for sleep-overs where they would have steamy overnight romps.

Within no time he began to have feelings for her because she had literally all the qualities he was looking for in a woman. For starters she had a tight Kim Kardashian figure, was a career submissive woman, a bully in the bedroom and to sum it all up, she was from his tribe and that would sit well with his folks.

He then decided to inform her that he wanted them to take their relationship to the next level. However, that’s when the lady started acting up.

At first she stopped showing up for dates and sleep overs, then she kept on giving excuse after excuse. Fed up with the sudden cold war, my buddy one day called her to inquire what might have gone wrong. You know what? She just coldly replied “I want us to take a break!”

He says he was left with no option but to take the break. At this point I’m  eager to know how this relationship break and the gym comes in, so I decide to do the shaving slowly so that he can can finish the story. He looks at himself in the mirror as if to confirm whether I’m cutting it right and continues with the narration. Apparently during the break, he decided to stalk ‘his’ girl on Facebook two weeks later and guess what? He came across her glamorous wedding photos.

Kumbe ‘his’ lady had had a wedding just the previous weekend and this left him shocked and devastated at the same time. He told me before this he had considered himself the real player, but his homegirl played him big time.

I burst out laughing loudly as my guy stretches out his huge arm - the size of my left thigh and wright arm combined - to hand me cash for the service and assures me that he’s soon heading back to the gym.

As I close the door behind him, I’m left with two questions on my mind: Was it that this girl’s fiancé decided that they should abstain until wedding day but the girl could not manage so she decided to secretly bring her cookie jar to this other guy?

Or was it that she suddenly met her prince charming who swept her off her feet during the mysterious break, resulting to a wedding just within two weeks? The jury is out!


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